Memoir is on my mind. I recently returned from the busy and exciting 2024 San Francisco Writing Conference—one reason I did not post last week! There at the Hyatt, I was hanging out with hundreds of creative people working hard to get their stories into the world. Eager writers soaking up all the wisdom they could get from the many excellent agents, editors, and presenters at this busy conference.
Every day, writers could meet for 10 minutes with their chosen agent or editor to discuss their project. I had a wonderful time meeting with memoir writers and listening to their questions. Watching their faces express their frustration and their joy about the progress of their memoir. I was reminded of my own journey to find my story and my voice. It took years, and during most of that time I was meandering, avoiding, remembering, not writing, or angsting about writing a memoir at all. What—expose all those embarrassing details about my family?
As is true for many who become memoir writers, I’d been a journaler. This meant I was writing in a form that didn’t require extensive details or world building. I wasn’t writing for a reader, only myself. I knew all the “characters” and could remember the descriptions and details of the stories, so no elaboration was needed. I could see the moments I was writing about, bring them up from my memory and fill in all the details that were not on the page.
But a memoir makes its demands. It’s a story, with all the requirements of a novel. A novel is written so a reader can enter the world of the story and feel immersed in the characters, the details, the moments that have meaning—and your memoir must do all that, too. When written well, the reader lives your story and sees it through your eyes, feels your feelings. The reader is immersed in your life’s struggle, and how you transformed and developed through the life challenges that every story offers.
Writing a memoir means you shift into creating a world that the reader can experience and present it through your point of view—it’s your story of how you lived these moments.
And you need to be willing to learn the craft of memoir—to write a story that’s true. It’s your story that you express and shape with the craft of creating a good story the reader can’t put down.
The most asked question at the conference during my editorial consultations: how do I make sense of all this stuff in my mind? Where and how do I start sorting it all out? The answer is simple: consider your turning points, the most significant moments that shaped your life.
The turning point method:
List the 10-20 main turning points that relate to the theme of your memoir. These moments will comprise the spine of your story as it evolves. Once you know what some of these moments are, you can create scenes that show your experience through using sensual details, revealing fully the lived experience of that moment.
Turning points are the basic component of building scenes. And scenes are the building blocks of your memoir. I’ll discuss scenes more soon, but simply—a scene is a significant moment played out with sensual details—touch, sound, vivid imagery, texture—the lived moment that matters. A moment you’re trying to make sense of. Bring it alive. Live it again. In that process all the wisdom and direction you need will arise. Rinse and repeat! Bit by bit, scene and memory and reflection build your story into a cohesive whole!
Learn more about scenes here:Scenes in Memoir--Brooke Warner and Linda Joy Myers
I remember turning points from the memoir classes I took with you and Brooke. It helped so much especially when I would find myself drifting. That book I worked on through your classes will publish in September. I’m grateful to have learned from you and Brooke.
Tori Jensen, author of CARRY, used the metaphor of a clothes hanger for scene. If you look at the words you've got down on paper and can't figure out how to organize it all, it's a lot like that feeling when you open up your closet and all the clothes are on the floor and falling out of the hamper and everywhere except on hangers. Looks like a mess until you put what you've got on hangers (scenes) and then you can put together a complete wardrobe -- mix until you match -- and one you can proudly wear in public.